Lawton/Oklahoma and Stockholm Syndrome

Before Brian got back from Afghanistan his friend, Mike (who lived in our house while we were gone), and I had a conversation about Lawton.  Lots of people who have been here for too long start saying things like "its not that bad", "well we made the best of it", or "well, we kind of like it".  I look at those people like they are insane and it drives me nuts.  Lawton is one of the most inconvenient places to live.  There is absolutely nothing for infants and toddlers to do here and services and stores/restaurants that most cities have (at least close by) are roughly a 3 hour drive north or south.  The weather here is HORRENDOUS in both the winter and the summer and there is no real fall or spring.  There are no real mountains nearby and you can't get to the beach in a day.  There are rattlesnakes, scorpions, and tarantulas in addition the the ginormous spiders that ambush your house.  I don't think its a very well kept secret that I HATE IT HERE.

So anyways, back to our conversation.  We were discussing how neither of us understand how people can say its not that bad or that they actually like it here.  Then Mike hit the nail right on the head...he said its like women that are in abusive relationships. Eventually they don't mind it and even defend their abuser.  They will say things like "well I shouldn't have said that to him", "He didn't hit me that hard" or "he didn't mean to hit me that hard".  They forget what its like to be in a healthy relationship because they psychological state becomes so broken.  Its essentially Stockholm Syndrome (even though Stockholm Syndrome refers to kidnap victims).  Lawton is the abuser and/or captor people stuck here for too long forget what its like to live somewhere that doesn't totally suck.  They think they actually like it here.  I will not give in, I will not accept this as a permanent residence, I will NEVER say that I like it here.  Mark my words, if I ever say that I do like it SEND HELP!  Here is a pretty good description of Stockholm Syndrome.

"Stockholm syndrome, or capture–bonding, is a psychological phenomenon in which hostages express empathy and sympathy and have positive feelings toward their captors, sometimes to the point of defending them. These feelings are generally considered irrational in light of the danger or risk endured by the victims, who essentially mistake a lack of abuse from their captors for an act of kindness.^[1][2] The FBI's Hostage Barricade Database System shows that roughly 27% of victims show evidence of Stockholm syndrome.^[3]

Stockholm syndrome can be seen as a form of traumatic bonding, which does not necessarily require a hostage scenario, but which describes “strong emotional ties that develop between two persons where one person intermittently harasses, beats, threatens, abuses, or intimidates the other.”^[4] One commonly used hypothesis to explain the effect of Stockholm syndrome is based on Freudian theory. It suggests that the bonding is the individual’s response to trauma in becoming a victim. Identifying with the aggressor is one way that the ego defends itself. When a victim believes the same values as the aggressor, they no longer become a threat. ^[5]"

*Taken from Wikipedia*