Mikey's Birth Story: The Complete Version

Disclaimer: This post is LONG and descriptive.  I have no desire to proof read so if spelling and grammar are absolutely horrible...I'm sorry, but I am pretty tired and don't really care at the moment. Enjoy!

As you know from the short version, my water started leaking Saturday morning.  I woke up around 5:30 with a pretty bad backache and not feeling too well.  I felt bad enough that I could not go back to sleep.  I kind of wondered if it was time to go to the hospital, but since we were picking my mom up in OKC around lunchtime I decided that it was NOT time.  I thought it to be a better idea to hop into the bathtub to see if some of the back pain and icky feeling would go away.  Sure enough, the bath helped a lot and I was able to continue on with getting ready for the airport run.  When Brian got up we cleaned the house and then headed up to OKC.  Upon arriving we had a few minutes to spare, so we headed to a local running shoe store to get Brian a new pair, as he has been suffering from some shin splints lately.  After doing a gait analysis and picking out a spiffy new pair or PT shoes, we made our way over to the airport to get my mom and then out to lunch at Toby Keith's I Love This Bar and Grill.  When lunch was finished we headed home and gave my mom a tour of Rotten Lawton and tiny Geronimo.  Once that was complete we headed back to the house for some relaxation.

Sunday morning I woke up feeling fine, but noticed more of the fluid had leaked over night.  I still wasn't feeling contractions and did not know that what I was seeing was amniotic fluid because there was such a small amount, so I went on with my day as normal. Same deal on Monday...woke up to some fluid, but chalked it up to sweat.  My mom and I went shopping and to get pedicures, my feet ballooned as usual and I felt fine, aside from the usual backache.  We then came home and I downed an entire pineapple trying to get labor started (even though it already was...oops).  After ingesting the whole thing we decided to wait  to do dinner, so we curled up on the couch to watch Dancing With the Stars.  I got up for one of my frequent bathroom breaks and noticed that my shorts were wet...not good.  I made sure that I had not peed my pants first and then asked my mom what she thought.  She thought that I better call the hospital to get their advice since baby is supposed to come out within 24 hours of your water breaking.  They told me that if I have any doubt that I should come in, so off to the hospital we went.

Upon arriving at the hospital around 9:30pm, I had a quick check to see if it was, indeed, my amniotic fluid that was leaking.  While waiting on the results I was hooked up to a fetal heart monitor to make sure Mikey was not in distress, he was fine and dandy.  Shortly after hooking me up to the monitors the nurse took off to look at the test results and was back in a jiffy.  She informed me that I would be staying because it was my water and since it had been leaking for so long they were going to get things moving right away and pump me full of antibiotics to prevent infection for me and baby.  So began the LONG night.  I was then transferred into the room where "all the magic happens" and was given an IV.  Now, for those of you who know me well, you know that I HATE to be stuck and I tend to freak out when getting poked.  I have been pretty good the entire pregnancy with all of the blood draws and what-not...but my fear, hormones, and adrenaline got the best of me and I lost it when the nurse went to start the IV.  I tried to laugh it off...I told them that it didn't even hurt and I didn't know why I was crying, I just can't handle the needles!  The nurse was great and hit me with one try (I also have awesome veins for IVs) so they were able to get the fluids, antibiotics, and Pitocin started ASAP.  Now I have heard some pretty gnarley things about Pitocin contractions, but I still didn't feel them.  Since most people have horrible contractions with the Pit, they sent the CRNA in pretty quickly to give me an epidural.  Upon his arrival they asked if I was having pain with the contractions and I informed them that I still did not feel them.  Apparently I am a freak like that.

The epidural (done around 11pm)...I loved it and hated it at the same time.  After learning how to give them and all about them at Nova, it was pretty cool to experience once.  It was also such a gross feeling, to feel the needle to through the ligament and to feel it so close to my spinal column.  When the catheter went in it was the weirdest zingy feeling...I kind of think that everyone who gives them should experience them at one point or another.  Anyways, I got numb pretty quickly but still had some control over my right side, my left side was completely useless.  It was great in that I did not feel a single contraction and that I did not feel the toddler that I birthed as he battered my lady parts.  I was under the effects of the epidural for a LONG time though and it started to make me feel antsy and claustrophobic that I couldn't move.  I could feel that I was uncomfortable, but couldn't do anything about it...I am not down with that.

So after a long night of being uncomfortable and anxious a new shift of people came on the clock at 7am.  I was bummed that Mikey didn't come out before then because I liked the doctor and my nurse and wanted them to be the ones to deliver the little dude.  I got 2 wonderful nurses, but I ended up with the one doctor that I had specifically requested NOT to have.  Its the guy that I was complaining about in a previous post...complete jackass.  He went as far as to say (literally about 2 seconds before I started pushing), "why did you wait so long to come in?  Did you not read all the things that you are supposed to come in for, did anyone know?  Why didn't you know to come in?".  He basically made me feel like complete shit for something that I had already stressed about all night.  I told the nurses how horrible I felt and they said sometimes its really hard to notice, especially if its a tiny leak like the one I had.  They also said not to worry about it because I was there now and doing what needed to be done.  Anyways, Dr Dickhead proceeds to be a jerk and I gave Brian "the look".  The look that I give when I'm about to absolutely lose my temper or when I'm going to leap across the room and strangle someone.  Since I had no use of my legs, the latter was not really in the cards, so I shut the guy up by saying "well, I DO sweat a lot and that's what it looked like to me.  Also, there's really not a whole lot we can do about it now, so how about we move on."  I did not use a nice tone, I used the tone that said, "if you don't shut up right now I am going to verbally assault you like you have never been verbally assaulted before".  He stopped, but I was PISSED.  Who says that to someone about to push a human being through their who-ha?  Whatever.

I started pushing at 9:20am, pushed until I thought my brains were going to spew out through my ears and eye sockets, was carved like a Thanksgiving turkey, and delivered my little guy at 9:53am.  It was the BIGGEST sense of relief and I immediately felt super model skinny.  As you saw by his stats, Mikey was a beastly child, so the instant relief and joy of hearing him cry and having him on my chest made me sob uncontrollably.  It was so awesome seeing him and holding him.  I also felt a huge sense of pride when I found out just how big he was.  When I told my mom what his name is I started sobbing uncontrollably again and only continued to sob more while explaining to the nurses who he is named after (That is for another post).  After he was cleaned and wrapped up, they handed him to me to feed him.  I was only able to for a few seconds, for some reason I was so weak that I couldn't even lift him up.  After those few seconds passed I handed him off to Brian, or rather Brian took him from me and I proceeded to puke my guts out, which wasn't much.  Did I mention that I had not eaten since lunchtime the previous day?  Yeah...I don't do so well with no food.  That was the first time the entire pregnancy that I threw up though...so I guess I never threw up while I was...not bad.  I also forgot to mention that my mom brought dinner to the hospital...I couldn't eat it.  The food people came into my room like 3 times, once with a tray of food that I couldn't eat...that was mean.  Then, as I'm puking up stomach acid and crying because my back and SPD(essentially my crotch bone) were KILLING me they are trying to take my food order.  My God!  LEAVE ME ALONE FOR 10 MINUTES!

Other things that happened while I was in a state of excruciating pain (secondary only to the pain I experienced upon waking up from ACL surgery with no nerve blocks):
-They tried to tell me the guidelines for feeding him
-Instructions for care of the butchered lady parts
-a bunch of other stuff that I don't remember

Ok...this post is ridiculously long...so that is Mikey's birth story.

The next few blogs will be about our hospital stay, coming home, first bath, and newborn photos.  I hope my detailed description of the night was not too much :-/  Stay tuned for a photo bomb post!